no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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