I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
