i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
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