are you still at the devil's house?
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
