Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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