Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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