I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
