I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I have aggressive nipples.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
