He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
