His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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