Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
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