My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
