one might say we're banned from that church
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
