JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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