On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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