She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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