no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize