Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Congratulations! We have a period
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