If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
