i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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