We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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