super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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