Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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