i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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