So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
