Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
