the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
you never un-have a 4some
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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