When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize