Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
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