Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
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