that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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