She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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