Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Dignity is for republicans.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Randomize
