Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
