Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
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