As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
