dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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