Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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