they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
