I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Randomize
