just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize