Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
