i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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