"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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