Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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