Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize