Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
i already hear my dad disowning me
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
