i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize