Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
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