Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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