What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
